Two Years Ago Today ... - The Perfectly Imperfect Mama

Two Years Ago Today ...

by - Thursday, May 03, 2018

I was fifteen weeks pregnant & was in a lot of physical pain.  But that physical pain was nothing compared to the heartache we were about to endure.

Two years ago today Dan & I found out that our sweet Ruthie Belle's heart was no longer beating.

I can't help but have tears rolling down my face as I read the post I shared with you just days after we found out.  Not knowing why it happened.  Not knowing what God had planned for our lives.  Not knowing if the heartache would ever go away.

And today I sit here ... two years later ... holding Ruthie Belle's precious two month old baby sister.

God didn't bless us with Ellie Joy to take Ruthie Belle's place.  No.  He sent her to heal my broken heart.  The same heart that two years ago I didn't know if it would ever be mended.  He knew my heart needed her.

God had a plan for Ruthie Belle's life.  Though her life was short, He has used her more than I could have ever imagined.  And He knew on this day, two years ago, as Dan & I sat in that ultrasound room crying, that we would have Ellie Joy today.

I still miss her & I will forever remember this day & the feelings I had sitting in that room.  Seeing my precious baby laying there perfectly inside my belly but not moving.  

Ruthie Belle, my third baby, I'll hold you in my heart until I hold you in Heaven.

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